3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
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