We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
