I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
