just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize