Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
it's like iHOP with fire
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
