she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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