SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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