Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
This girl is more easily done than said...
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
