Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
