She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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