I puked a lego.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
