I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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