Hey man sorry I got all grabby
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
