nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize
