youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
