I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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