Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I'm determined to sit on that face.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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