why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize