so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
The Olympian is in my bed
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
