Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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