My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Randomize
