OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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