I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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