Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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