love makes seman taste better
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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