these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
