OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
so much tequila, so little girl.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Randomize
