What did we do last night that was yellow?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
