I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Dear god my vagina.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
