is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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