Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
