Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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