Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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