nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
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