we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
