I'm pants shitting drunk right now
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
