Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
