its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize