I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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