I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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