Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
