I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Oh god it's open bar.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
