can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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