there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
