fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
