i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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