do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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