he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
