Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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