Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
