Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
