well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I'm just crazy horny about you
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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